by Chris Widener
"Far better it is to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure, than to take rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy nor suffer much, because they live in the gray twilight that knows neither victory nor defeat."Teddy Roosevelt
Do you remember when you were a child and no dream seemed too big? Some of us thought we would walk on the moon; some dreamed of riding with Roy Rogers; others imagined stepping to the plate in a big-league game. Every one of us, when we were young, had a common trait - we were dreamers. The world hadn't gotten to us yet to show us that we couldn't possibly achieve what our hearts longed for. And we were yet still years from realizing that in some cases we weren't built for achieving our dream (I realized about my junior year of high school that I was too short and to slow to play professional basketball. The dreamer is always the last to know).
Eventually we started to let our dreams die. People began to tell us that we couldn't do the things we wanted. It was impossible. Responsible people don't pursue their dreams. Settle down, get a job, be dependable. Take care of business, live the mundane, be content. Do you know what I say to that? Hooey!
It is time to dream again!
Why? Here are just a few reasons:
Avoiding regret. The facts are in, and someday we will all lie on our deathbed looking back through the history of our lives. We will undoubtedly think about what we wished we had done or accomplished. I for one don't want to regret what could have been, what should have been. So I am deciding today to pursue my dreams.
Making the world a better place. All of the great accomplishments that have ever happened began with a person who had a dream. Somebody rebuffed the nay-sayers and said to themselves, "This can be done, and I am the one who will do it." And in many instances they changed the world for the better. It isn't just the Martin Luther King's and the J.F.K's either. Think of all the people we have never heard of who have started things large and small that help people world-wide every day. The world needs people like you to dream of something great and then to pursue it will all of your heart. Maybe you belong to a business, school, or organization that started out with good intentions but has settled into the same ol' same ol'. Shake them up and remind them of how they could really help people if only they would dream!
Personal and family fulfillment. One of the things that happens when we stop pursuing our dreams is that a little piece of us dies and we become disheartened, if only in that area of our lives. Stepping up and pursuing your dream rekindles that passion and zeal that everyone has the capacity for and lets us experience fulfillment. Having a purpose puts the zip in our step and the zing in our emotions!
Leaving a legacy. How will your children remember you? As one who sought all that life had to offer, using your gifts and talents to their fullest extent, leading the family with a zest for life, or as an overweight couch potato who could have been? Our children need to see that we dream; that we search for something better. They in turn will do the same!
So where do we start? Here are some ideas:
Reconnect with your dream. Set aside some time to let yourself dream. What have you placed on the backburner in order to live the status quo? Settle on one or two dreams that you can and will pursue. Don't come up with too many. That will only deter you further.
Decide that you will do it. This may seem elementary but many people never decide and commit fully to their dream. They simply keep "thinking" about it.
Tell others that you are going to do it. This puts you on the record as to what you are dreaming about. It makes you accountable. It will help you do it if for no other reason than to avoid embarrassment!
Develop a step-by-step plan. This is absolutely essential. You must sit down and write out a few things:
1. A timeline. How long will it take to the end?
2. Action steps. Point-by-point what you will do and when you will do them.
3. Resources you will need to draw from. What will it take? Who will need to be involved for help or advice?
4. An evaluation tool. You need to evaluate from time to time whether you are progressing or not.
5. A celebration. Yep, when you are done you should already have planned what you will do to celebrate. Make it big!
I have found that there is no better time than now. So, set aside some time today to get started on your dream. Follow the action plan and set your sights for the top of the mountain! You will be glad you did!
Thursday, May 28, 2009
Sunday, May 24, 2009
Bad Luck, Bad Choices, and Bad Habits
Another great article by Chris! Enjoy!
by Chris Widener
We were at some friend’s house the other day and the wife mentioned some other acquaintances of ours. “It sure is too bad, all the bad luck they have,” She said.
My first thought was, “Bad habits, not bad luck.”
My second thought was, “Or is it bad choices?”
You see, there is a difference. What we many times call bad luck is merely bad choices.
Let me explain:
If you work hard, buy a new car, keep it up with regular maintenance and blow a tire driving down the road, that is bad luck.
However, if you drive on your tires until they are almost bald and drive at speeds higher than they are recommended for, and keep them at the wrong inflation level, and then the tire blows, that is not bad luck but bad choices. The tire blew because you chose not to buy new ones. The tire blew because you chose not to take the time to check your tire inflation level the last time you filled up the tank.
It is bad luck to leave your house on vacation and while you are away the gas line breaks and the house blows up.
It is bad habits to not tend to taking care of your house, replacing the roof, painting, etc until it is a junk pile.
It is bad luck to be let go from a company that goes into meltdown because the CEO acted unethically and the stock tanks, forcing layoffs.
It is both bad choices and bad habits to be late to work everyday, display shoddy workmanship and have a bad attitude to the point that the boss fires you.
If you choose to frequent shady parts of town or risky establishments, and you get mugged, is that bad luck or bad choices?
You get the point.
How often do we call something bad luck when it is really the result of bad habits or bad choices?
This really boils down to a matter of ownership of our lives and actions. Do we take full responsibility for our lives or not?
I know of a gentleman who was recently passed over for a job. It would have paid him $13,000 for a week’s worth of work. The person who passed him over told me why. Knowing this gentleman, I said, “It is too bad, because with a few good choices, that guy could be living in a nice house, driving nice cars, and having very few financial problems.”
What about you? Do you experience bad luck? Or bad habits? Or bad choices?
The next time you hear someone say, “He’s down on his luck,” perhaps you ought to ask, “Or is he down on his choices?”
I have found that those who have good habits and make good choices tend to experience the best luck!
So, if you want a little good luck, make some good choices and develop some good habits.
by Chris Widener
We were at some friend’s house the other day and the wife mentioned some other acquaintances of ours. “It sure is too bad, all the bad luck they have,” She said.
My first thought was, “Bad habits, not bad luck.”
My second thought was, “Or is it bad choices?”
You see, there is a difference. What we many times call bad luck is merely bad choices.
Let me explain:
If you work hard, buy a new car, keep it up with regular maintenance and blow a tire driving down the road, that is bad luck.
However, if you drive on your tires until they are almost bald and drive at speeds higher than they are recommended for, and keep them at the wrong inflation level, and then the tire blows, that is not bad luck but bad choices. The tire blew because you chose not to buy new ones. The tire blew because you chose not to take the time to check your tire inflation level the last time you filled up the tank.
It is bad luck to leave your house on vacation and while you are away the gas line breaks and the house blows up.
It is bad habits to not tend to taking care of your house, replacing the roof, painting, etc until it is a junk pile.
It is bad luck to be let go from a company that goes into meltdown because the CEO acted unethically and the stock tanks, forcing layoffs.
It is both bad choices and bad habits to be late to work everyday, display shoddy workmanship and have a bad attitude to the point that the boss fires you.
If you choose to frequent shady parts of town or risky establishments, and you get mugged, is that bad luck or bad choices?
You get the point.
How often do we call something bad luck when it is really the result of bad habits or bad choices?
This really boils down to a matter of ownership of our lives and actions. Do we take full responsibility for our lives or not?
I know of a gentleman who was recently passed over for a job. It would have paid him $13,000 for a week’s worth of work. The person who passed him over told me why. Knowing this gentleman, I said, “It is too bad, because with a few good choices, that guy could be living in a nice house, driving nice cars, and having very few financial problems.”
What about you? Do you experience bad luck? Or bad habits? Or bad choices?
The next time you hear someone say, “He’s down on his luck,” perhaps you ought to ask, “Or is he down on his choices?”
I have found that those who have good habits and make good choices tend to experience the best luck!
So, if you want a little good luck, make some good choices and develop some good habits.
Saturday, May 23, 2009
Remember it on 3x5 Cards
Great idea!!!
By Sean Silverthorne
I have an unhealthy interest in learning how great people organized their daily lives. Did Einstein carry a To-Do list? Is the Dalai Lama an iCal guy?
So it was interesting to learn that Ted Levitt, one of the stellar pioneers of marketing at Harvard Business School, carried around a pack of blank 3×5 cards to write down what came to him during the day.
According to Alan Webber, who worked with Levitt at Harvard Business Review, Levitt would write down the kernels of conversations and observations that ultimately could lead to new story ideas. Webber decided to go 3×5, too. This practice made him not just a better observer, but a better listener, Webber writes on Harvard Business Publishing.
“When you keep 3 x 5 cards close at hand, you don’t just listen to what people are saying; you listen into their ideas. You pay close attention to the way the words work — or don’t work — to capture an idea or an argument. As an involved listener you help others frame or reframe an idea so it clicks into place: you become an idea chiropractor. You find yourself using your conversations strategically, listening to learn, and learning to make sense of the world. And each day, as you assemble that day’s collection of 3 x 5 cards, you discover new lessons that help you develop your own understanding of how the world really works, your own rules of thumb that comprise your guide to work and life in a time of unrelenting turbulence.”
Sounds like a pretty powerful payoff for such a low-rent solution. How do you keep track of thoughts and ideas during the day? Moleskine? Digital notepad? Paper scraps?
By Sean Silverthorne
I have an unhealthy interest in learning how great people organized their daily lives. Did Einstein carry a To-Do list? Is the Dalai Lama an iCal guy?
So it was interesting to learn that Ted Levitt, one of the stellar pioneers of marketing at Harvard Business School, carried around a pack of blank 3×5 cards to write down what came to him during the day.
According to Alan Webber, who worked with Levitt at Harvard Business Review, Levitt would write down the kernels of conversations and observations that ultimately could lead to new story ideas. Webber decided to go 3×5, too. This practice made him not just a better observer, but a better listener, Webber writes on Harvard Business Publishing.
“When you keep 3 x 5 cards close at hand, you don’t just listen to what people are saying; you listen into their ideas. You pay close attention to the way the words work — or don’t work — to capture an idea or an argument. As an involved listener you help others frame or reframe an idea so it clicks into place: you become an idea chiropractor. You find yourself using your conversations strategically, listening to learn, and learning to make sense of the world. And each day, as you assemble that day’s collection of 3 x 5 cards, you discover new lessons that help you develop your own understanding of how the world really works, your own rules of thumb that comprise your guide to work and life in a time of unrelenting turbulence.”
Sounds like a pretty powerful payoff for such a low-rent solution. How do you keep track of thoughts and ideas during the day? Moleskine? Digital notepad? Paper scraps?
Golf’s Colorful Language Goes With Any Green
You have to be a golfer to understand!! Enjoy!!
By BILL PENNINGTON
Do you speak golf?
Do you play for Barkies? Or Arnies? Do you avail yourself of the breakfast ball and love a good game of Bingo, Bango, Bongo?
Have you found yourself dormie, stymied, plugged or in the cabbage?
Have you dubbed it, shrimped it, shanked it, dinked it or duck-hooked it? And do you know the difference? Have you hit a scooter? How about one in the side door?
Are you a sandbagger? A pigeon? A player? A hooker?
Do you know who lovingly called his putter Billy Baroo?
In other words, are you conversant in the dialect of golf? Do you not only play golf but also revel in all of its idiosyncratic, peculiar lingo?
I hope so. It’s the code of the tribe, sometimes the best part of being in the weird golf fraternity. Nothing can assuage the misery of a poor shot like a good, self-deprecating idiom for your idiocy.
Golfers could say, “Oh, that’s a bad shot.” But why, when they can say they chunked it, skulled it or smothered it?
And golf linguistics are not just for your bad shots. In fact, most of the terms deal with making fun of your partners’ shots. Because theirs are never simply in trouble, in a pond or out of bounds. They are in jail, rinsed or Oscar Bravo.
This vernacular is centuries old, passed on and continually abridged and expanded, especially with references that are amazingly relevant to pop culture. There are sayings linked to Rush Limbaugh and Nancy Pelosi (think of shots going right or left), Osama Bin Laden (think of all the bunkers on a golf course) and Paris Hilton (think of anything). O.K., many of these references are too risqué to be repeated here, but it makes me feel good that golf — a so-called stodgy game invented five centuries ago — can stay current.
It also proves to me something nongolfers often fail to grasp: old-fashioned golf is at its heart an old-fashioned social exercise.
“Golf lingo developed because the golf course is a place where people get to know each other, and the game is so hard it especially leads to teasing, joking and ragging on each other,” said Randy Voorhees, the author of “The Little Book of Golf Slang.”
“The lingo has persisted because golf is a game you play for a lifetime,” he said. “So parents pass the terms on to their children, or older players use this colorful vernacular around younger players, and it becomes a natural way of speaking on the golf course.”
The first time you hit a ball on the green and someone calls for it to “sit,” does that not perfectly describe what you want the ball to do? If you hit a ball in the water and someone says it is “wet,” does that not forevermore seem like the best portrayal of its position and your disposition?
“A lot of golf terms actually evoke an image of what is happening out there,” Voorhees said. “You can carve, feather or gouge a shot, and once you learn to perform those shots, they are words that exactly describe what you’re trying to do.”
The golf lexicon has not developed by accident. David Normoyle, the assistant director of the United States Golf Association Museum, cited three primary reasons.
“One, golf is played over such a vast, irregular surface, we need a myriad of descriptions for play on a golf course,” he said. “Two, golf is truly a global game and has many local variations and flavors. Lastly, and perhaps more than anything else, golf has had great poets, and they have tried to capture the essence of the game.”
Who knew that having “the shanks” was meant to be literature?
Now if you’re a beginner or a casual player, you may find golfspeak to be another intimidating barrier to feeling comfortable on the course — a verbal version of golf’s code of behavioral etiquettes. But don’t fret.
There are no secret passwords in the pro shop or trick questions posed on the first tee. People are engrossed in their own games. Don’t play slowly or throw your clubs, and no one will care much about your golf vocabulary.
“Keep your ears open; you’ll learn it all as you go,” Voorhees said. “Soon it will flow out of your mouth naturally.”
I would make one suggestion: visit the local municipal golf course. A lot about golf can be learned there in general, but without question, it is where you will hear the richest, most saucy golf phrases.
But please, don’t be a mute out there. You may come up with a new term for our treasured golf glossary.
Speaking of which, I don’t have time to give definitions for every piece of golf slang used in this article. If you really need translations, they won’t be too hard to come by.
But I can’t leave anyone hanging about Billy Baroo, because “Caddyshack” references are sacred in the cult. The great Ted Knight, as Judge Smails, called his lucky putter Billy Baroo. Years later, that commendation held such merit that it became the name of a line of real putters.
If you are new to golf, understanding the Smails character’s role in the American game is pivotal. Watch the movie some Saturday night after a great, or horrible, round. You’ll feel better — and understand the lingo a bit better.
It also may help explain why you’ve seen someone stand on the first tee and pause to announce, “Gambling is illegal at Bushwood, sir, and I never slice.”
Next time, you’ll be able to bet a hundred bucks they slice it into the woods.
In Layman’s Terms
NASSAU A group game with three bets: low score on the front nine, back nine and for the full 18 holes.
BARKIES A bet won for making par after hitting a tree.
ACEY DEUCEY A group betting game in which the low scorer on each hole (ace) wins money from the other three players and the high scorer (deuce) loses money to the other three players.
BINGO, BANGO, BONGO A points game awarding a point to the first player on the green (bingo), a point for being closest to the hole when everyone has reached the green (bango) and a point for being the first in the hole (bongo).
By BILL PENNINGTON
Do you speak golf?
Do you play for Barkies? Or Arnies? Do you avail yourself of the breakfast ball and love a good game of Bingo, Bango, Bongo?
Have you found yourself dormie, stymied, plugged or in the cabbage?
Have you dubbed it, shrimped it, shanked it, dinked it or duck-hooked it? And do you know the difference? Have you hit a scooter? How about one in the side door?
Are you a sandbagger? A pigeon? A player? A hooker?
Do you know who lovingly called his putter Billy Baroo?
In other words, are you conversant in the dialect of golf? Do you not only play golf but also revel in all of its idiosyncratic, peculiar lingo?
I hope so. It’s the code of the tribe, sometimes the best part of being in the weird golf fraternity. Nothing can assuage the misery of a poor shot like a good, self-deprecating idiom for your idiocy.
Golfers could say, “Oh, that’s a bad shot.” But why, when they can say they chunked it, skulled it or smothered it?
And golf linguistics are not just for your bad shots. In fact, most of the terms deal with making fun of your partners’ shots. Because theirs are never simply in trouble, in a pond or out of bounds. They are in jail, rinsed or Oscar Bravo.
This vernacular is centuries old, passed on and continually abridged and expanded, especially with references that are amazingly relevant to pop culture. There are sayings linked to Rush Limbaugh and Nancy Pelosi (think of shots going right or left), Osama Bin Laden (think of all the bunkers on a golf course) and Paris Hilton (think of anything). O.K., many of these references are too risqué to be repeated here, but it makes me feel good that golf — a so-called stodgy game invented five centuries ago — can stay current.
It also proves to me something nongolfers often fail to grasp: old-fashioned golf is at its heart an old-fashioned social exercise.
“Golf lingo developed because the golf course is a place where people get to know each other, and the game is so hard it especially leads to teasing, joking and ragging on each other,” said Randy Voorhees, the author of “The Little Book of Golf Slang.”
“The lingo has persisted because golf is a game you play for a lifetime,” he said. “So parents pass the terms on to their children, or older players use this colorful vernacular around younger players, and it becomes a natural way of speaking on the golf course.”
The first time you hit a ball on the green and someone calls for it to “sit,” does that not perfectly describe what you want the ball to do? If you hit a ball in the water and someone says it is “wet,” does that not forevermore seem like the best portrayal of its position and your disposition?
“A lot of golf terms actually evoke an image of what is happening out there,” Voorhees said. “You can carve, feather or gouge a shot, and once you learn to perform those shots, they are words that exactly describe what you’re trying to do.”
The golf lexicon has not developed by accident. David Normoyle, the assistant director of the United States Golf Association Museum, cited three primary reasons.
“One, golf is played over such a vast, irregular surface, we need a myriad of descriptions for play on a golf course,” he said. “Two, golf is truly a global game and has many local variations and flavors. Lastly, and perhaps more than anything else, golf has had great poets, and they have tried to capture the essence of the game.”
Who knew that having “the shanks” was meant to be literature?
Now if you’re a beginner or a casual player, you may find golfspeak to be another intimidating barrier to feeling comfortable on the course — a verbal version of golf’s code of behavioral etiquettes. But don’t fret.
There are no secret passwords in the pro shop or trick questions posed on the first tee. People are engrossed in their own games. Don’t play slowly or throw your clubs, and no one will care much about your golf vocabulary.
“Keep your ears open; you’ll learn it all as you go,” Voorhees said. “Soon it will flow out of your mouth naturally.”
I would make one suggestion: visit the local municipal golf course. A lot about golf can be learned there in general, but without question, it is where you will hear the richest, most saucy golf phrases.
But please, don’t be a mute out there. You may come up with a new term for our treasured golf glossary.
Speaking of which, I don’t have time to give definitions for every piece of golf slang used in this article. If you really need translations, they won’t be too hard to come by.
But I can’t leave anyone hanging about Billy Baroo, because “Caddyshack” references are sacred in the cult. The great Ted Knight, as Judge Smails, called his lucky putter Billy Baroo. Years later, that commendation held such merit that it became the name of a line of real putters.
If you are new to golf, understanding the Smails character’s role in the American game is pivotal. Watch the movie some Saturday night after a great, or horrible, round. You’ll feel better — and understand the lingo a bit better.
It also may help explain why you’ve seen someone stand on the first tee and pause to announce, “Gambling is illegal at Bushwood, sir, and I never slice.”
Next time, you’ll be able to bet a hundred bucks they slice it into the woods.
In Layman’s Terms
NASSAU A group game with three bets: low score on the front nine, back nine and for the full 18 holes.
BARKIES A bet won for making par after hitting a tree.
ACEY DEUCEY A group betting game in which the low scorer on each hole (ace) wins money from the other three players and the high scorer (deuce) loses money to the other three players.
BINGO, BANGO, BONGO A points game awarding a point to the first player on the green (bingo), a point for being closest to the hole when everyone has reached the green (bango) and a point for being the first in the hole (bongo).
Friday, May 22, 2009
The Hole in Obama's Leadership Style?
Excellent Leadership article!! Enjoy!
By Sean Silverthorne
He delivers great speeches. He paints a vision. He can mediate, motivate, consensus build and compromise.
But what we don’t know is whether Barack Obama is tough enough to enforce the difficult decisions he is laying out for the country.
Leadership expert Michael Watkins, writing in his blog on Harvard Business Publishing, wonders whether Obama is really the best type of leader for a turnaround.
Watkins says his own research on power transitions shows that leaders entering a situation where storm clouds are still on the horizon requires a much different leadership style (the “steward”) than what is required in the Obama situation, where the storm has already broken (the “hero”). Writes Watkins:
“In turnarounds, the situation demands heroism, by which I mean a visionary, charismatic, and often-highly directive form of leadership. Think of Shakespeare’s King Henry the Fifth at the Battle of Agincourt sprinting forward, sword in hand yelling, ‘Once more into the breech, dear friends.’ Think too of Henry’s willingness to execute the traitors who opposed him.”
Does that sound like the Obama style? Watkins wonders.
“Does our new President have the heroism within him to force (yes force) the nation to swallow some very bitter medicine? Because he strikes me more as a steward than a hero. This is potentially a big problem because consensus-building-on-steroids simply isn’t going to cut it.”
Another look at Obama’s early challenges comes from Barbara Kellerman of the Harvard Kennedy School. While Watkins sees Henry the Fifth as role model for the current challenge, Kellerman thinks a master juggler might be a better analogy.
“The most obvious leadership skills President Obama will need to demonstrate are a sense of clarity and purpose, and the ability to sort through competing demands, both domestically and internationally. The multiplicity of decisions that he’s going to be required to make immediately is possibly unparalleled. So above all, he will be asked to be reasonably calm in the face of particularly critical and tense times. That suits him very well because he happens to have a calm nature, but at the same time he will need to convey a sense of urgency.”
As Obama rolls into the second week of his presidency, how do you think he is doing as a leader? Where is he strong, and where might his leadership style be lacking?
By Sean Silverthorne
He delivers great speeches. He paints a vision. He can mediate, motivate, consensus build and compromise.
But what we don’t know is whether Barack Obama is tough enough to enforce the difficult decisions he is laying out for the country.
Leadership expert Michael Watkins, writing in his blog on Harvard Business Publishing, wonders whether Obama is really the best type of leader for a turnaround.
Watkins says his own research on power transitions shows that leaders entering a situation where storm clouds are still on the horizon requires a much different leadership style (the “steward”) than what is required in the Obama situation, where the storm has already broken (the “hero”). Writes Watkins:
“In turnarounds, the situation demands heroism, by which I mean a visionary, charismatic, and often-highly directive form of leadership. Think of Shakespeare’s King Henry the Fifth at the Battle of Agincourt sprinting forward, sword in hand yelling, ‘Once more into the breech, dear friends.’ Think too of Henry’s willingness to execute the traitors who opposed him.”
Does that sound like the Obama style? Watkins wonders.
“Does our new President have the heroism within him to force (yes force) the nation to swallow some very bitter medicine? Because he strikes me more as a steward than a hero. This is potentially a big problem because consensus-building-on-steroids simply isn’t going to cut it.”
Another look at Obama’s early challenges comes from Barbara Kellerman of the Harvard Kennedy School. While Watkins sees Henry the Fifth as role model for the current challenge, Kellerman thinks a master juggler might be a better analogy.
“The most obvious leadership skills President Obama will need to demonstrate are a sense of clarity and purpose, and the ability to sort through competing demands, both domestically and internationally. The multiplicity of decisions that he’s going to be required to make immediately is possibly unparalleled. So above all, he will be asked to be reasonably calm in the face of particularly critical and tense times. That suits him very well because he happens to have a calm nature, but at the same time he will need to convey a sense of urgency.”
As Obama rolls into the second week of his presidency, how do you think he is doing as a leader? Where is he strong, and where might his leadership style be lacking?
The Golf Lesson
Another great life story told through Golf!!!! Enjoy!
by Michael T. Smith
Michael lives and works in Caldwell, Idaho with his beautiful wife Ginny. He writes in his spare time and is currently working on a collection of his stories to be called, "From My Heart to Yours." To read more of Michael's stories go to: http://ourecho.com/biography-353-Michael-Timothy-Smith.shtml#stories or go to: http://visitor.constantcontact.com/d.jsp?m=1101828445578&p=oi to sign up and receive his stories.
"Do you golf, Mike?" Jim asked.
"Not much, but..." I began to tell him three stories I never tire of telling.
***************************
Except for a few birds, the course was quiet. It was a great morning for golf: no one ahead to slow me down, no one behind to rush me forward. I looked down the hill. The fifth hole of the nine-hole, par 3 course lay below and one hundred and seventy yards away. The flag hung limp in the still air. A small knoll at the front of the green hid the cup. I checked my score card again. It was definitely a good day. After four holes, I was only six over par. I grabbed my seven iron, approached the tee, placed my ball, glanced at the flag, and positioned myself. After another look at the flag, I drew my club back and swung. The iron whistled through the air, struck the ball at an angle, and drove it spinning through the air. It started toward the hole, but the spin and aerodynamics took control. I watched helplessly as the ball sliced to the right, away from the hole, and head for the tall grass that separated the fairway from the forest. It slipped between the blades of grass, disappeared, bounced off something hard, and reappeared. I stood in shock. The ball bounced across the fairway, jumped over a sand trap, leaped onto the green, and headed toward the flag. It disappeared behind the small knoll. I waited for it to reappear. It didn't. "That must be close to the hole." I thought. I grabbed my clubs, walked down the hill, and approached the green. My eyes remained focused on the area around the flag. My ball was nowhere in sight, but the cup was still hidden by the knoll. I climbed to the top of the knoll. The cup came into view, but my ball didn't. The green was empty. I didn't think the ball rolled fast enough to go over the edge of the green, but I walked around to the back anyway. My ball wasn't there. I turned and look at the cup again. "It couldn't have?" My heart began to pound as I walked closer to the hole. There was my ball, nestled close to the pin at the bottom of the cup. It remains the only hole-in-one I ever got. There were no witnesses to my feat.
***************************
Jack and I stood at the tee-off to the first hole of an eighteen-hole, par-three course. My best friend took his first shot and came up short of the green. I teed off and watched my ball land a little short and slightly to the right of the green. Jack's second shot put him on the green, a few feet from the hole. I grabbed my wedge, stood by my ball, and judged the distance. My light swing lifted the ball from the grass in a smooth arc toward the green. It hit the rough at the edge of the green, bounced, rolled smoothly toward the flag, and plopped into the cup for a birdie. On the second hole, it happened again. I chipped my second shot into the hole. After double-bogeying the third hole, I chipped another one in on the fourth - three birdies in four holes. My game returned to normal. A double-bogey was something to get excited about. At the eighteenth hole, my first shot placed the ball at the edge of the green. My second shot bounced the ball across the green and into the cup for my fourth birdie of the day.
***************************
Don, my neighbour, looked at my ball. "You can take a free lift from there."
"You're right, Don, but the ground is level. I think I'll just shoot it from here."
I swung and lifted the ball in a high arc. I silently cursed. The ball appeared to be headed deep into the brush behind the green. I watched as it climbed higher and lose momentum in the wind. At the highest point in its arc, it lost speed, and dropped straight into the hole, rattling the flag as it did. Don was shocked. "In my more than forty years of golfing, I have never seen anyone drop a ball into the hole like that. What a shot! It's a birdie too." I smiled. "Thanks, Don."
***************************
I finished the last story. Jim looked at me. "You sound too good for me to play."
"Actually, I suck at golf." I smiled. "I just told you the best." What I didn't talk about were all the balls that landed in the woods and didn't bounce out. I didn't mention the trophy I won for the most lost balls in one round. Jim doesn't know I lost the hole-in-one ball in the woods on my next shot, and he doesn't know that the day I got four birdies, my final score was twenty-two over par. If someone asks me about my life, I tell them I had to move seven times between provinces, countries, and states. I talk about my wife, who died too young, the numerous jobs that ended before I thought they would, and I whine about the money hardships. It's all negative. It's time for me to tell the golf story. I loved and married a wonderful woman and shared the rest of her life with her. In the process, we created two children. I moved seven times and got to meet wonderful people and experience things that most can only dream about. I remarried to an amazing woman and we share a beautiful life together.
Life is hard - life is good. It's how you tell the story.
Now "that" is a golf lesson!
by Michael T. Smith
Michael lives and works in Caldwell, Idaho with his beautiful wife Ginny. He writes in his spare time and is currently working on a collection of his stories to be called, "From My Heart to Yours." To read more of Michael's stories go to: http://ourecho.com/biography-353-Michael-Timothy-Smith.shtml#stories or go to: http://visitor.constantcontact.com/d.jsp?m=1101828445578&p=oi to sign up and receive his stories.
"Do you golf, Mike?" Jim asked.
"Not much, but..." I began to tell him three stories I never tire of telling.
***************************
Except for a few birds, the course was quiet. It was a great morning for golf: no one ahead to slow me down, no one behind to rush me forward. I looked down the hill. The fifth hole of the nine-hole, par 3 course lay below and one hundred and seventy yards away. The flag hung limp in the still air. A small knoll at the front of the green hid the cup. I checked my score card again. It was definitely a good day. After four holes, I was only six over par. I grabbed my seven iron, approached the tee, placed my ball, glanced at the flag, and positioned myself. After another look at the flag, I drew my club back and swung. The iron whistled through the air, struck the ball at an angle, and drove it spinning through the air. It started toward the hole, but the spin and aerodynamics took control. I watched helplessly as the ball sliced to the right, away from the hole, and head for the tall grass that separated the fairway from the forest. It slipped between the blades of grass, disappeared, bounced off something hard, and reappeared. I stood in shock. The ball bounced across the fairway, jumped over a sand trap, leaped onto the green, and headed toward the flag. It disappeared behind the small knoll. I waited for it to reappear. It didn't. "That must be close to the hole." I thought. I grabbed my clubs, walked down the hill, and approached the green. My eyes remained focused on the area around the flag. My ball was nowhere in sight, but the cup was still hidden by the knoll. I climbed to the top of the knoll. The cup came into view, but my ball didn't. The green was empty. I didn't think the ball rolled fast enough to go over the edge of the green, but I walked around to the back anyway. My ball wasn't there. I turned and look at the cup again. "It couldn't have?" My heart began to pound as I walked closer to the hole. There was my ball, nestled close to the pin at the bottom of the cup. It remains the only hole-in-one I ever got. There were no witnesses to my feat.
***************************
Jack and I stood at the tee-off to the first hole of an eighteen-hole, par-three course. My best friend took his first shot and came up short of the green. I teed off and watched my ball land a little short and slightly to the right of the green. Jack's second shot put him on the green, a few feet from the hole. I grabbed my wedge, stood by my ball, and judged the distance. My light swing lifted the ball from the grass in a smooth arc toward the green. It hit the rough at the edge of the green, bounced, rolled smoothly toward the flag, and plopped into the cup for a birdie. On the second hole, it happened again. I chipped my second shot into the hole. After double-bogeying the third hole, I chipped another one in on the fourth - three birdies in four holes. My game returned to normal. A double-bogey was something to get excited about. At the eighteenth hole, my first shot placed the ball at the edge of the green. My second shot bounced the ball across the green and into the cup for my fourth birdie of the day.
***************************
Don, my neighbour, looked at my ball. "You can take a free lift from there."
"You're right, Don, but the ground is level. I think I'll just shoot it from here."
I swung and lifted the ball in a high arc. I silently cursed. The ball appeared to be headed deep into the brush behind the green. I watched as it climbed higher and lose momentum in the wind. At the highest point in its arc, it lost speed, and dropped straight into the hole, rattling the flag as it did. Don was shocked. "In my more than forty years of golfing, I have never seen anyone drop a ball into the hole like that. What a shot! It's a birdie too." I smiled. "Thanks, Don."
***************************
I finished the last story. Jim looked at me. "You sound too good for me to play."
"Actually, I suck at golf." I smiled. "I just told you the best." What I didn't talk about were all the balls that landed in the woods and didn't bounce out. I didn't mention the trophy I won for the most lost balls in one round. Jim doesn't know I lost the hole-in-one ball in the woods on my next shot, and he doesn't know that the day I got four birdies, my final score was twenty-two over par. If someone asks me about my life, I tell them I had to move seven times between provinces, countries, and states. I talk about my wife, who died too young, the numerous jobs that ended before I thought they would, and I whine about the money hardships. It's all negative. It's time for me to tell the golf story. I loved and married a wonderful woman and shared the rest of her life with her. In the process, we created two children. I moved seven times and got to meet wonderful people and experience things that most can only dream about. I remarried to an amazing woman and we share a beautiful life together.
Life is hard - life is good. It's how you tell the story.
Now "that" is a golf lesson!
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
The 2 Most Important Lists You'll Ever Keep
Great article!! Enjoy!
By Sean Silverthorne
It’s time to create two lists, arguably the only two you’ll need to keep focused at work.
1. Things That Keep Me Up At Night.
2. Reasons I Get Up In The Morning.
According to Alan M. Webber, blogging on Harvard Business Publishing, the items you put on these lists helps define who you are — the first step toward becoming a better manager.
“Managers and leaders have got to know themselves before they know their businesses,” writes Webber. “They’ve got to have passion for their work and concern for their world. Otherwise they’re just punching the time clock and risking everyone’s future.”
Webber includes this advice in a larger post on the topic of what business schools should be teaching their students. It jumped out at me as a worthy exercise to help many of us gain perspective as well as keep our priorities straight.
Writing my own lists, I was struck at how much the recession is both keeping me up at night (for example, worry over what the economy is doing to people I know both financially and psychologically) as well as fueling my creative energy (using simplicity and focus to leverage fewer resources into more productivity). I wonder, is there something I can do to move more ‘keep me up’ items to the ‘reasons to go to work’ side of the ledger?
How would you fill out your lists?
By Sean Silverthorne
It’s time to create two lists, arguably the only two you’ll need to keep focused at work.
1. Things That Keep Me Up At Night.
2. Reasons I Get Up In The Morning.
According to Alan M. Webber, blogging on Harvard Business Publishing, the items you put on these lists helps define who you are — the first step toward becoming a better manager.
“Managers and leaders have got to know themselves before they know their businesses,” writes Webber. “They’ve got to have passion for their work and concern for their world. Otherwise they’re just punching the time clock and risking everyone’s future.”
Webber includes this advice in a larger post on the topic of what business schools should be teaching their students. It jumped out at me as a worthy exercise to help many of us gain perspective as well as keep our priorities straight.
Writing my own lists, I was struck at how much the recession is both keeping me up at night (for example, worry over what the economy is doing to people I know both financially and psychologically) as well as fueling my creative energy (using simplicity and focus to leverage fewer resources into more productivity). I wonder, is there something I can do to move more ‘keep me up’ items to the ‘reasons to go to work’ side of the ledger?
How would you fill out your lists?
Saturday, May 16, 2009
How to Reach Your Goals
By Carol Sorgen
Great article! Experts describe strategies for setting goals -- and making sure you achieve them. To achieve and be succesful in LIFE, you need to set GOALS! Period!
We all have goals. What are yours? To lose 20 pounds? Get in shape? Buy a new house? Make more money? Having a goal is the easy part. Reaching it? Well, that's something else entirely. If you're frustrated because you feel like you keep coming up short when it comes to realizing your dreams, maybe it's time to try a different approach.
When setting a goal, ask yourself first of all if your goals are realistic and if you are really ready to make the changes in your life necessary to reach those goals.
"Most people don't take into consideration whether they're ready to do what it takes to achieve their goals," says Steven Rosenberg, PhD. Rosenberg is a behavior therapist, the team psychotherapist for the Philadelphia Flyers hockey team, and author of I Hope the Hell I WIN! Turning Hope into Reality…How Winners Win! If you're going through a stressful time at work, for example, this may not be the best time to start a weight loss program; maybe you'd do better to wait a few months and start on, say, your birthday.
Be realistic as well, says Rosenberg. You can't lose 40 pounds in two weeks, or even a month. Set an achievable objective, such as 1 to 2 pounds a week; by the end of the year, you will have lost the 40 pounds.
Be Committed
"Goals that get reached are those that are firm, well-defined, and to which the individual is truly and completely committed," says Susan Schachterle, director of the Denver-based Ahimsa Group, which provides consulting and coaching services to individuals and organizations worldwide. "Without that commitment, trying to reach goals is like grabbing Jell-O -- you think maybe you have it, but there's really nothing to hang on to."
Schachterle suggests that you check your commitment. Ask yourself why you want to achieve that particular goal. What will that do for you? Why is it important? What will your life be like when you have reached it? How will achieving your goal change things for you?
"If you're having trouble making a strong commitment," says Schachterle, "make sure it's the right goal and the right time for you."
The Art of Saying 'No'
Another reason many people don't reach their goals is that they just can't say no -- to everyone else. "Many of us, especially women, put other things and people first," says Susan Newman, PhD, a social psychologist at Rutgers University and author of The Book of NO: 250 Ways to Say It-and Mean It and Stop People-Pleasing Forever. We're unable to refuse when asked for our time, our talent, our expertise, or merely our presence.
"Saying yes is a habit we're not even aware of," says Newman. "Think 'no' before you think 'yes' (not the other way around). By adding the word 'no' to your vocabulary, you open up vistas of time, not only to work toward a goal but also to think about how to reach it," Newman says. "In short, you put boundaries in place and establish priorities in the correct order [for you]."
If you haven't mastered the art of saying "no" and you think that's derailing your efforts to reach your goals, Newman suggests taking these steps:
Great article! Experts describe strategies for setting goals -- and making sure you achieve them. To achieve and be succesful in LIFE, you need to set GOALS! Period!
We all have goals. What are yours? To lose 20 pounds? Get in shape? Buy a new house? Make more money? Having a goal is the easy part. Reaching it? Well, that's something else entirely. If you're frustrated because you feel like you keep coming up short when it comes to realizing your dreams, maybe it's time to try a different approach.
When setting a goal, ask yourself first of all if your goals are realistic and if you are really ready to make the changes in your life necessary to reach those goals.
"Most people don't take into consideration whether they're ready to do what it takes to achieve their goals," says Steven Rosenberg, PhD. Rosenberg is a behavior therapist, the team psychotherapist for the Philadelphia Flyers hockey team, and author of I Hope the Hell I WIN! Turning Hope into Reality…How Winners Win! If you're going through a stressful time at work, for example, this may not be the best time to start a weight loss program; maybe you'd do better to wait a few months and start on, say, your birthday.
Be realistic as well, says Rosenberg. You can't lose 40 pounds in two weeks, or even a month. Set an achievable objective, such as 1 to 2 pounds a week; by the end of the year, you will have lost the 40 pounds.
Be Committed
"Goals that get reached are those that are firm, well-defined, and to which the individual is truly and completely committed," says Susan Schachterle, director of the Denver-based Ahimsa Group, which provides consulting and coaching services to individuals and organizations worldwide. "Without that commitment, trying to reach goals is like grabbing Jell-O -- you think maybe you have it, but there's really nothing to hang on to."
Schachterle suggests that you check your commitment. Ask yourself why you want to achieve that particular goal. What will that do for you? Why is it important? What will your life be like when you have reached it? How will achieving your goal change things for you?
"If you're having trouble making a strong commitment," says Schachterle, "make sure it's the right goal and the right time for you."
The Art of Saying 'No'
Another reason many people don't reach their goals is that they just can't say no -- to everyone else. "Many of us, especially women, put other things and people first," says Susan Newman, PhD, a social psychologist at Rutgers University and author of The Book of NO: 250 Ways to Say It-and Mean It and Stop People-Pleasing Forever. We're unable to refuse when asked for our time, our talent, our expertise, or merely our presence.
"Saying yes is a habit we're not even aware of," says Newman. "Think 'no' before you think 'yes' (not the other way around). By adding the word 'no' to your vocabulary, you open up vistas of time, not only to work toward a goal but also to think about how to reach it," Newman says. "In short, you put boundaries in place and establish priorities in the correct order [for you]."
If you haven't mastered the art of saying "no" and you think that's derailing your efforts to reach your goals, Newman suggests taking these steps:
- Make a list of how many times a day you say 'yes.' "You'll be startled," says Newman.
- Pay attention to how you parcel out your time. "For most of us, it just disappears. … Who's monopolizing the time you could otherwise spend on reaching your goals?"
- Set priorities. Who has first dibs on you and your time?
- Look at your limitations. When do you start to lose your stamina? "Don't keep pushing until you run out of steam and collapse altogether," Newman advises.
- Let go of control. You don't have to do it all yourself. "If you're doing everything else, there's no time for you to get back to your goal."
Be Specific
There are two tricks to properly setting your goals, says University of Alabama at Birmingham clinical psychologist Joshua Klapow, PhD. Klapow is co-author of Stop Telling Me What-Tell Me How: The Simple Answer to Better Health.
First, turn goals into specific behaviors, says Klapow. "To say that you are going to exercise doesn't tell you which exercise to do, for how long and how frequently. If you don't know what to do, you are less likely to do the behavior. Be specific. Saying that you plan to walk five minutes a day -- and increase the time by one minute each week until you are walking 30 minutes per day -- is better than just saying that you plan to exercise."
Klapow's second tip is to make sure you are successful at reaching your goals right from the start. "Resolutions need to be things you can actually do," he says. "This is important because you are more likely to repeat the behaviors in which you are successful. Set short- and long-term target goals and make the short-term goals easy to reach."
At this time of year, when many of us are making New Year's resolutions, Klapow reminds us that resolutions are basically a set of new behaviors. Because the behaviors are new, and not learned habits, we have a tendency to slip back into our old behavior patterns.
"The best way to keep track of what you are doing every day," says Klapow, "is to get a calendar and write down every time you perform your new habit. Don't leave it up to your mind because your mind can play tricks on you. Three days without performing your new habit is your sign that you may be slipping."
The Benefits of Intuition
- Stay focused on the positive. Pay attention to what is working, not what isn't. Perhaps a friend called to cheer you up, or your child got off to school this morning without a major tantrum, or you had a really nice lunch with a colleague. "Find those precious slivers of appreciation in each day."
- Take small steps. There is a two-part trick of working toward a goal: No. 1, just begin, and No. 2, start small. Take a first step toward what you feel excited about and then take another one, and then another one. "Remain centered in the present."
- Make your intuition your ally. Intuition is "quick and ready insight" and it's one of the most helpful tools to use when faced with any kind of decision making. It's also a skill that can be developed. The more you practice it the better you get at it. How does your intuition speak to you? Do you receive information in words, feelings, a flash of insight, a body sensation? Do you just know? "Intuition is the secret weapon of many successful people who describe it as knowing something directly without going through a long analytical process," says Robinson.
Getting your friends and family involved can also help you reach your goals, says Sandra Beckwith, leader of "Finding the Courage to Change" workshops. "You need someone who will reject your usual excuses -- 'I can't afford it,' 'I don't know how,' etc. -- and help you see that there's a way around every obstacle," says Beckwith. "He or she can brainstorm with you. … This allows you to see a situation from a different perspective, through fresh eyes."
Actually seeing your goal written down can also help you keep it in the forefront of your mind, adds Newman. "Tape reminders all over the house so your goal will always be in front of you -- literally."
Be Positive
Goals tend to be arbitrary and number-oriented, says Frost, such as the number of pounds lost, amount of money earned, number of hours spent in the gym, and so on. Intentions, on the other hand, are "big-picture" statements about what fulfills you.
Yes, your goal is to lose 20 pounds in six months, but what's your intention? How about, "I feel strong, healthy, fit, confident, attractive, and sexy," says Frost. "The number on the scale isn't what matters most -- it's how you feel each day."
Positive thinking is often more effective than negative thinking when it comes to changing health behaviors. For example, people quit smoking more readily when the positive aspects of health are emphasized, rather than the negative side.
"Intentions allow us to picture ourselves -- and how we'll feel -- when we are successful," says Frost. "There's no room for failure in the picture. We focus on the positive and powerful feelings we'll have."
Picturing Success
The most effective way to change our beliefs is to create a mental story of success, Frost says. We need to picture ourselves as we want to be, and we need to talk about it. Her basic formula: See it. Say it. Hear it.
- See yourself in the circumstances you desire. Picture it perfectly.
- Craft a one-sentence story that you would like to be true, and say it in the present tense, as though you are describing your life right now.
- Keep repeating yourself. Demand to hear that same story every night before you go to sleep.
"When it comes to achieving your goals, being positive is so important," agrees Rosenberg. "When you see in your mind's eye what you want to achieve, it becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy."
Friday, May 15, 2009
Golf’s Colorful Language Goes With Any Green
By BILL PENNINGTON of the New York Times
Do you speak golf?
Do you play for Barkies? Or Arnies? Do you avail yourself of the breakfast ball and love a good game of Bingo, Bango, Bongo?
Have you found yourself dormie, stymied, plugged or in the cabbage?
Have you dubbed it, shrimped it, shanked it, dinked it or duck-hooked it? And do you know the difference? Have you hit a scooter? How about one in the side door?
Are you a sandbagger? A pigeon? A player? A hooker?
Do you know who lovingly called his putter Billy Baroo?
In other words, are you conversant in the dialect of golf? Do you not only play golf but also revel in all of its idiosyncratic, peculiar lingo?
I hope so. It’s the code of the tribe, sometimes the best part of being in the weird golf fraternity. Nothing can assuage the misery of a poor shot like a good, self-deprecating idiom for your idiocy.
Golfers could say, “Oh, that’s a bad shot.” But why, when they can say they chunked it, skulled it or smothered it?
And golf linguistics are not just for your bad shots. In fact, most of the terms deal with making fun of your partners’ shots. Because theirs are never simply in trouble, in a pond or out of bounds. They are in jail, rinsed or Oscar Bravo.
This vernacular is centuries old, passed on and continually abridged and expanded, especially with references that are amazingly relevant to pop culture. There are sayings linked to Rush Limbaugh and Nancy Pelosi (think of shots going right or left), Osama Bin Laden (think of all the bunkers on a golf course) and Paris Hilton (think of anything). O.K., many of these references are too risqué to be repeated here, but it makes me feel good that golf — a so-called stodgy game invented five centuries ago — can stay current.
It also proves to me something nongolfers often fail to grasp: old-fashioned golf is at its heart an old-fashioned social exercise.
“Golf lingo developed because the golf course is a place where people get to know each other, and the game is so hard it especially leads to teasing, joking and ragging on each other,” said Randy Voorhees, the author of “The Little Book of Golf Slang.”
“The lingo has persisted because golf is a game you play for a lifetime,” he said. “So parents pass the terms on to their children, or older players use this colorful vernacular around younger players, and it becomes a natural way of speaking on the golf course.”
The first time you hit a ball on the green and someone calls for it to “sit,” does that not perfectly describe what you want the ball to do? If you hit a ball in the water and someone says it is “wet,” does that not forevermore seem like the best portrayal of its position and your disposition?
“A lot of golf terms actually evoke an image of what is happening out there,” Voorhees said. “You can carve, feather or gouge a shot, and once you learn to perform those shots, they are words that exactly describe what you’re trying to do.”
The golf lexicon has not developed by accident. David Normoyle, the assistant director of the United States Golf Association Museum, cited three primary reasons.
“One, golf is played over such a vast, irregular surface, we need a myriad of descriptions for play on a golf course,” he said. “Two, golf is truly a global game and has many local variations and flavors. Lastly, and perhaps more than anything else, golf has had great poets, and they have tried to capture the essence of the game.”
Who knew that having “the shanks” was meant to be literature?
Now if you’re a beginner or a casual player, you may find golfspeak to be another intimidating barrier to feeling comfortable on the course — a verbal version of golf’s code of behavioral etiquettes. But don’t fret.
There are no secret passwords in the pro shop or trick questions posed on the first tee. People are engrossed in their own games. Don’t play slowly or throw your clubs, and no one will care much about your golf vocabulary.
“Keep your ears open; you’ll learn it all as you go,” Voorhees said. “Soon it will flow out of your mouth naturally.”
I would make one suggestion: visit the local municipal golf course. A lot about golf can be learned there in general, but without question, it is where you will hear the richest, most saucy golf phrases.
But please, don’t be a mute out there. You may come up with a new term for our treasured golf glossary.
Speaking of which, I don’t have time to give definitions for every piece of golf slang used in this article. If you really need translations, they won’t be too hard to come by.
But I can’t leave anyone hanging about Billy Baroo, because “Caddyshack” references are sacred in the cult. The great Ted Knight, as Judge Smails, called his lucky putter Billy Baroo. Years later, that commendation held such merit that it became the name of a line of real putters.
If you are new to golf, understanding the Smails character’s role in the American game is pivotal. Watch the movie some Saturday night after a great, or horrible, round. You’ll feel better — and understand the lingo a bit better.
It also may help explain why you’ve seen someone stand on the first tee and pause to announce, “Gambling is illegal at Bushwood, sir, and I never slice.”
Next time, you’ll be able to bet a hundred bucks they slice it into the woods.
In Layman’s Terms
NASSAU A group game with three bets: low score on the front nine, back nine and for the full 18 holes.
BARKIES A bet won for making par after hitting a tree.
ACEY DEUCEY A group betting game in which the low scorer on each hole (ace) wins money from the other three players and the high scorer (deuce) loses money to the other three players.
BINGO, BANGO, BONGO A points game awarding a point to the first player on the green (bingo), a point for being closest to the hole when everyone has reached the green (bango) and a point for being the first in the hole (bongo).
Do you speak golf?
Do you play for Barkies? Or Arnies? Do you avail yourself of the breakfast ball and love a good game of Bingo, Bango, Bongo?
Have you found yourself dormie, stymied, plugged or in the cabbage?
Have you dubbed it, shrimped it, shanked it, dinked it or duck-hooked it? And do you know the difference? Have you hit a scooter? How about one in the side door?
Are you a sandbagger? A pigeon? A player? A hooker?
Do you know who lovingly called his putter Billy Baroo?
In other words, are you conversant in the dialect of golf? Do you not only play golf but also revel in all of its idiosyncratic, peculiar lingo?
I hope so. It’s the code of the tribe, sometimes the best part of being in the weird golf fraternity. Nothing can assuage the misery of a poor shot like a good, self-deprecating idiom for your idiocy.
Golfers could say, “Oh, that’s a bad shot.” But why, when they can say they chunked it, skulled it or smothered it?
And golf linguistics are not just for your bad shots. In fact, most of the terms deal with making fun of your partners’ shots. Because theirs are never simply in trouble, in a pond or out of bounds. They are in jail, rinsed or Oscar Bravo.
This vernacular is centuries old, passed on and continually abridged and expanded, especially with references that are amazingly relevant to pop culture. There are sayings linked to Rush Limbaugh and Nancy Pelosi (think of shots going right or left), Osama Bin Laden (think of all the bunkers on a golf course) and Paris Hilton (think of anything). O.K., many of these references are too risqué to be repeated here, but it makes me feel good that golf — a so-called stodgy game invented five centuries ago — can stay current.
It also proves to me something nongolfers often fail to grasp: old-fashioned golf is at its heart an old-fashioned social exercise.
“Golf lingo developed because the golf course is a place where people get to know each other, and the game is so hard it especially leads to teasing, joking and ragging on each other,” said Randy Voorhees, the author of “The Little Book of Golf Slang.”
“The lingo has persisted because golf is a game you play for a lifetime,” he said. “So parents pass the terms on to their children, or older players use this colorful vernacular around younger players, and it becomes a natural way of speaking on the golf course.”
The first time you hit a ball on the green and someone calls for it to “sit,” does that not perfectly describe what you want the ball to do? If you hit a ball in the water and someone says it is “wet,” does that not forevermore seem like the best portrayal of its position and your disposition?
“A lot of golf terms actually evoke an image of what is happening out there,” Voorhees said. “You can carve, feather or gouge a shot, and once you learn to perform those shots, they are words that exactly describe what you’re trying to do.”
The golf lexicon has not developed by accident. David Normoyle, the assistant director of the United States Golf Association Museum, cited three primary reasons.
“One, golf is played over such a vast, irregular surface, we need a myriad of descriptions for play on a golf course,” he said. “Two, golf is truly a global game and has many local variations and flavors. Lastly, and perhaps more than anything else, golf has had great poets, and they have tried to capture the essence of the game.”
Who knew that having “the shanks” was meant to be literature?
Now if you’re a beginner or a casual player, you may find golfspeak to be another intimidating barrier to feeling comfortable on the course — a verbal version of golf’s code of behavioral etiquettes. But don’t fret.
There are no secret passwords in the pro shop or trick questions posed on the first tee. People are engrossed in their own games. Don’t play slowly or throw your clubs, and no one will care much about your golf vocabulary.
“Keep your ears open; you’ll learn it all as you go,” Voorhees said. “Soon it will flow out of your mouth naturally.”
I would make one suggestion: visit the local municipal golf course. A lot about golf can be learned there in general, but without question, it is where you will hear the richest, most saucy golf phrases.
But please, don’t be a mute out there. You may come up with a new term for our treasured golf glossary.
Speaking of which, I don’t have time to give definitions for every piece of golf slang used in this article. If you really need translations, they won’t be too hard to come by.
But I can’t leave anyone hanging about Billy Baroo, because “Caddyshack” references are sacred in the cult. The great Ted Knight, as Judge Smails, called his lucky putter Billy Baroo. Years later, that commendation held such merit that it became the name of a line of real putters.
If you are new to golf, understanding the Smails character’s role in the American game is pivotal. Watch the movie some Saturday night after a great, or horrible, round. You’ll feel better — and understand the lingo a bit better.
It also may help explain why you’ve seen someone stand on the first tee and pause to announce, “Gambling is illegal at Bushwood, sir, and I never slice.”
Next time, you’ll be able to bet a hundred bucks they slice it into the woods.
In Layman’s Terms
NASSAU A group game with three bets: low score on the front nine, back nine and for the full 18 holes.
BARKIES A bet won for making par after hitting a tree.
ACEY DEUCEY A group betting game in which the low scorer on each hole (ace) wins money from the other three players and the high scorer (deuce) loses money to the other three players.
BINGO, BANGO, BONGO A points game awarding a point to the first player on the green (bingo), a point for being closest to the hole when everyone has reached the green (bango) and a point for being the first in the hole (bongo).
Wednesday, May 13, 2009
Find The Right Fit: Strengths, Passion, People
Great article!!
By Jim Citrin & Rick Smith
August 2004
Failure’s hard, but success is far more dangerous. If you’re successful at the wrong thing, the mix of praise and money and opportunity can lock you in forever. - Po Bronson
When love and skill work together, expect a masterpiece. - John Ruskin
Finding the right fit is the most differentiating of the five patterns of extraordinary executives. Extraordinary executives lead careers that use both their strengths and passions more than six times as often as average employees. The implications of these findings are profound: not only is it possible to combine your strengths and passions in the same job, success demands it.
So near, yet so far
Finding your strengths, passions and cultural fit will mean you are happier and more successful in your career.
Given the clear cut nature of this principle, it is incredible to note that only nine percent of executives surveyed believe they are in jobs in which they are performing activities they are passionate about in an environment and with people whom they like and respect.
Career push vs. pull
A common approach to career management is the career push. This entails pushing your way up a ladder, climbing from one step to the next and the next and so on.
There is, however, a more effective way – allowing your preferences in terms of strengths, passions and people to pull your career steadily along in a better direction.
Using the career pull approach means allowing your career to migrate, often gradually, towards the activities, roles and environments you know from experience that you prefer and are most passionate about.
It requires clear reflection and in some cases making difficult choices like going against current promotions of turning down jobs others would envy. It means taking the long view when managing your career and thoroughly assessing the various career alternatives afforded to you.
Four strategies
Finding the right fit is not easily accomplished but there are four strategies which can help you get closer to the mark:
By Jim Citrin & Rick Smith
August 2004
Failure’s hard, but success is far more dangerous. If you’re successful at the wrong thing, the mix of praise and money and opportunity can lock you in forever. - Po Bronson
When love and skill work together, expect a masterpiece. - John Ruskin
Finding the right fit is the most differentiating of the five patterns of extraordinary executives. Extraordinary executives lead careers that use both their strengths and passions more than six times as often as average employees. The implications of these findings are profound: not only is it possible to combine your strengths and passions in the same job, success demands it.
So near, yet so far
Finding your strengths, passions and cultural fit will mean you are happier and more successful in your career.
Given the clear cut nature of this principle, it is incredible to note that only nine percent of executives surveyed believe they are in jobs in which they are performing activities they are passionate about in an environment and with people whom they like and respect.
Career push vs. pull
A common approach to career management is the career push. This entails pushing your way up a ladder, climbing from one step to the next and the next and so on.
There is, however, a more effective way – allowing your preferences in terms of strengths, passions and people to pull your career steadily along in a better direction.
Using the career pull approach means allowing your career to migrate, often gradually, towards the activities, roles and environments you know from experience that you prefer and are most passionate about.
It requires clear reflection and in some cases making difficult choices like going against current promotions of turning down jobs others would envy. It means taking the long view when managing your career and thoroughly assessing the various career alternatives afforded to you.
Four strategies
Finding the right fit is not easily accomplished but there are four strategies which can help you get closer to the mark:
- Macromanage your career
- Create career options
- Watch for career flares
- Work with the right people
When you consider that work takes up around two thirds of our waking lives it is worth finding the right fit and working with the right people so that, with a little bit of patience and a little bit of luck, you attain true satisfaction.
This extract is taken from The 5 Patterns of Extraordinary Careers by James M. Citrin and Richard A. Smith, published by Random House.
Your Attitude - You Choose
Great article. You have the choice each and every day! Make great choices!
By Chris Widener
There are lots of things in this life that we don’t get to choose. On the other hand, there are lots of thing in this life that we do get to choose. Our attitude is one of the things that we get to choose. Nobody else lives inside our brain. Nobody else controls what or how we think. It is up to us, moment by moment, to choose what our attitude is. It is up to us to determine how we will look at and perceive the world around us. It is up to us to decide how we will react to our world around us.
My advice? Choose a positive, optimistic attitude! Here are some thought on choosing your attitude.
We cannot choose our circumstances. For the most part, this is true. We cannot control if someone around us gets ill. We cannot control how another person will treat us. We cannot control the global economy. We cannot control the direction our society as a whole will go. For some, this may seem scary. For me, it is freeing. I don’t have to control my circumstances. Running the whole world would be a big responsibility. It is good to know that I am not in charge of, or in control of all of my circumstances. This dose of reality frees you to focus in on what you can control – your attitude!
We can choose our attitudes. That’s right. We get to choose what our attitudes are. Here is the definition of attitude: “The feeling or opinion about something or someone, or a way of behaving that follows from this.” We choose how we feel about others and situations. We choose our opinion about people and situations. We choose the way we will behave in relation to other people and circumstances. We choose it. It doesn’t have to be bad. It doesn’t have to be anything but what we want it to be. We have the option.
The choice of a right attitude will significantly determine new circumstances. Choosing to have the right attitude will change the world around you. This isn’t any sort of magic; it is just how the world works. Now, don’t get me wrong. It won’t cure everything and turn your world into a virtual Shangri-La, but it will significantly improve the world you live in. For example, let’s say that every day you go into work and you gripe about life and work from the moment you get there until the moment you leave. Will others want to be around you? Will others ask your opinion? Will others like you? Will others ask you to join them for lunch? Probably not! But what if you come to work every day and you are the positive optimist of the crowd? Will everybody love you? No, but significantly more people will than if you are the office pessimist! Your choice of attitude will determine what kind of circumstances you get!
Ultimately, it is our choice on what we have as an attitude. Nobody else can force you to have a bad attitude. Nobody else can force you to have a good attitude. It is simply a choice you make.
Where are you with your attitude? Do you have a good one? Why not sit down and give it some serious thought? Then, no matter where you find yourself, decide to take your attitude to the next level! If you have a really bad attitude, decide to take it up a couple of levels!
Your attitude. Your choice. Choose wisely.
By Chris Widener
There are lots of things in this life that we don’t get to choose. On the other hand, there are lots of thing in this life that we do get to choose. Our attitude is one of the things that we get to choose. Nobody else lives inside our brain. Nobody else controls what or how we think. It is up to us, moment by moment, to choose what our attitude is. It is up to us to determine how we will look at and perceive the world around us. It is up to us to decide how we will react to our world around us.
My advice? Choose a positive, optimistic attitude! Here are some thought on choosing your attitude.
We cannot choose our circumstances. For the most part, this is true. We cannot control if someone around us gets ill. We cannot control how another person will treat us. We cannot control the global economy. We cannot control the direction our society as a whole will go. For some, this may seem scary. For me, it is freeing. I don’t have to control my circumstances. Running the whole world would be a big responsibility. It is good to know that I am not in charge of, or in control of all of my circumstances. This dose of reality frees you to focus in on what you can control – your attitude!
We can choose our attitudes. That’s right. We get to choose what our attitudes are. Here is the definition of attitude: “The feeling or opinion about something or someone, or a way of behaving that follows from this.” We choose how we feel about others and situations. We choose our opinion about people and situations. We choose the way we will behave in relation to other people and circumstances. We choose it. It doesn’t have to be bad. It doesn’t have to be anything but what we want it to be. We have the option.
The choice of a right attitude will significantly determine new circumstances. Choosing to have the right attitude will change the world around you. This isn’t any sort of magic; it is just how the world works. Now, don’t get me wrong. It won’t cure everything and turn your world into a virtual Shangri-La, but it will significantly improve the world you live in. For example, let’s say that every day you go into work and you gripe about life and work from the moment you get there until the moment you leave. Will others want to be around you? Will others ask your opinion? Will others like you? Will others ask you to join them for lunch? Probably not! But what if you come to work every day and you are the positive optimist of the crowd? Will everybody love you? No, but significantly more people will than if you are the office pessimist! Your choice of attitude will determine what kind of circumstances you get!
Ultimately, it is our choice on what we have as an attitude. Nobody else can force you to have a bad attitude. Nobody else can force you to have a good attitude. It is simply a choice you make.
Where are you with your attitude? Do you have a good one? Why not sit down and give it some serious thought? Then, no matter where you find yourself, decide to take your attitude to the next level! If you have a really bad attitude, decide to take it up a couple of levels!
Your attitude. Your choice. Choose wisely.
Great Golf Poem
In My Hand I Hold A Ball,
White And Dimpled, Rather Small.Oh, How Bland It Does Appear,
This Harmless Looking Little Sphere.
By Its Size I Could Not Guess,
The Awesome Strength It Does Possess.
But Since I Fell Beneath Its Spell,
I've Wandered Through The Fires Of Hell.
My Life Has Not Been Quite The Same,
Since I Chose To Play This Stupid Game.
It Rules My Mind For Hours On End,
A Fortune It Has Made Me Spend.
It Has Made Me Yell, Curse And Cry,
I Hate Myself And Want To Die.
It Promises A Thing Called Par,
If I Can Hit It Straight And Far.
To Master Such A Tiny Ball,
Should Not Be Very Hard At All.
But My Desires The Ball Refuses,
And Does Exactly As It Chooses.
It Hooks And Slices, Dribbles And Dies,
And Even Disappears Before My Eyes.
Often It Will Have A Whim,
To Hit A Tree Or Take A Swim.
With Miles Of Grass On Which To Land,
It Finds A Tiny Patch Of Sand.
Then Has Me Offering Up My Soul,
If Only It Would Find The Hole.
It's Made Me Whimper Like A Pup,
And Swear That I Will Give It Up.
And Take To Drink To Ease My Sorrow,
But The Ball Knows ... I'll Be Back Tomorrow.
Should Not Be Very Hard At All.
But My Desires The Ball Refuses,
And Does Exactly As It Chooses.
It Hooks And Slices, Dribbles And Dies,
And Even Disappears Before My Eyes.
Often It Will Have A Whim,
To Hit A Tree Or Take A Swim.
With Miles Of Grass On Which To Land,
It Finds A Tiny Patch Of Sand.
Then Has Me Offering Up My Soul,
If Only It Would Find The Hole.
It's Made Me Whimper Like A Pup,
And Swear That I Will Give It Up.
And Take To Drink To Ease My Sorrow,
But The Ball Knows ... I'll Be Back Tomorrow.
Tuesday, May 12, 2009
Leading Through Adversity
By Dr. John C. Maxwell. John is an internationally recognized leadership expert, speaker, and author who has sold over 16 million books. EQUIP, the organization he founded has trained more than 2 million leaders worldwide. Every year he speaks to Fortune 500 companies, international government leaders, and audiences as diverse as the United States Military Academy at West Point, the National Football League, and ambassadors at the United Nations. A New York Times, Wall Street Journal, and Business Week best-selling author, Maxwell was named the World's Top Leadership Guru by Leadershipgurus.net. He was also one of only 25 authors and artists named to Amazon.com's 10th Anniversary Hall of Fame. Three of his books, The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership, Developing the Leader Within You, and The 21 Indispensable Qualities of a Leader have each sold over a million copies.
Another one of my favorite authors!!
Had Chesly B. Sullenberger known that US Airways Flight 1549 would fly through a flock of geese and lose both engines, then he likely would have stayed out of the cockpit that day. After all, who in their right mind wants to pilot an engineless aircraft? Thankfully for the 155 passengers on board, however, the veteran airman was at the controls to safely crash-landed the plane in the Hudson River.
Although he never would have volunteered for the adversity he faced in the skies above New York City, Sullenberger's influence soared as a result of his leadership in the midst of harrowing circumstances. Before January 15th, Sullenberger was an accomplished, but anonymous pilot. Afterward, he was recognized as an American hero, drew a captive audience whenever he spoke, and was highly sought after by federal aviation officials for his safety recommendations.
Going through adversity, though not pleasant at the moment, opens the door to new levels of influence. By staying poised and keeping a positive attitude under pressure, leaders can pass through adversity having grown in stature more than they ever could have in comfortable times. In this article, I'd like to focus on the potential benefits that can be gained by triumphing over adverse conditions.
Overcoming Adversity Creates Resilience
A study in Time magazine in the 1980's described the incredible resilience of a group of people who had lost their jobs on three occasions due to plant closings. Researchers expected them to be discouraged, but they were surprisingly optimistic. Their adversity had turned into advantage. Because they had already coped with job loss and found employment at least twice, they were better equipped to handle adversity than people who had always worked for the same company and found themselves unemployed for the first time.
Overcoming Adversity Develops Maturity
During more than four decades as a pilot, both with the Air Force commercial airlines, Chesly B. Sullenberger had to weather his share of storms and mechanical glitches. When questioned by Katie Couric about his heroic landing of US Airways Flight 1549, Sullenberger credited his past experiences for giving him the maturity to steer the plane. "One way of looking at this might be that, for 42 years, I've been making small, regular deposits in this bank of experience: education and training. And on January 15 the balance was sufficient so that I could make a very large withdrawal." As an African proverb says, "Smooth seas do not make skillful sailors." The bumps in the road may seem only to be nuisances, but they're often the best instructors on the leadership journey. If we're observant, the lessons learned during hard times can be mined at a later date for our advantage.
Overcoming Adversity Creates Greater Opportunities
Just about every successful entrepreneur I've met has numerous stories of setbacks that opened the door to greater opportunities. Consider these not-so-flattering moments from the lives of famous Americans.
In the middle of adversity, it can be difficult to stave off feelings of hopelessness, but oftentimes a bright future waits on the other side of hardship. The mental strength acquired in dealing with misfortune can be an invaluable asset in pushing forward into new ventures.
Overcoming Adversity Wins Respect
Respect almost always is gained on difficult ground. In the words of Plutarch, "The measure of a man is the way he bears up under misfortune." No one sees your courage in the sunshine. It takes difficulty and darkness to prove bravery. When others see your character and persistence during the rough stretches in leadership, they walk away with an enhanced opinion of you.
SUMMARY
The economic crunch creates adversity, and leaders feel its pain and pressure acutely. While no one hopes for adversity, it can actually serve to benefit a leader. By bearing in mind the potential upside of leading through difficulty, it can be easier to deal with our present troubles.
Another one of my favorite authors!!
Had Chesly B. Sullenberger known that US Airways Flight 1549 would fly through a flock of geese and lose both engines, then he likely would have stayed out of the cockpit that day. After all, who in their right mind wants to pilot an engineless aircraft? Thankfully for the 155 passengers on board, however, the veteran airman was at the controls to safely crash-landed the plane in the Hudson River.
Although he never would have volunteered for the adversity he faced in the skies above New York City, Sullenberger's influence soared as a result of his leadership in the midst of harrowing circumstances. Before January 15th, Sullenberger was an accomplished, but anonymous pilot. Afterward, he was recognized as an American hero, drew a captive audience whenever he spoke, and was highly sought after by federal aviation officials for his safety recommendations.
Going through adversity, though not pleasant at the moment, opens the door to new levels of influence. By staying poised and keeping a positive attitude under pressure, leaders can pass through adversity having grown in stature more than they ever could have in comfortable times. In this article, I'd like to focus on the potential benefits that can be gained by triumphing over adverse conditions.
Overcoming Adversity Creates Resilience
A study in Time magazine in the 1980's described the incredible resilience of a group of people who had lost their jobs on three occasions due to plant closings. Researchers expected them to be discouraged, but they were surprisingly optimistic. Their adversity had turned into advantage. Because they had already coped with job loss and found employment at least twice, they were better equipped to handle adversity than people who had always worked for the same company and found themselves unemployed for the first time.
Overcoming Adversity Develops Maturity
During more than four decades as a pilot, both with the Air Force commercial airlines, Chesly B. Sullenberger had to weather his share of storms and mechanical glitches. When questioned by Katie Couric about his heroic landing of US Airways Flight 1549, Sullenberger credited his past experiences for giving him the maturity to steer the plane. "One way of looking at this might be that, for 42 years, I've been making small, regular deposits in this bank of experience: education and training. And on January 15 the balance was sufficient so that I could make a very large withdrawal." As an African proverb says, "Smooth seas do not make skillful sailors." The bumps in the road may seem only to be nuisances, but they're often the best instructors on the leadership journey. If we're observant, the lessons learned during hard times can be mined at a later date for our advantage.
Overcoming Adversity Creates Greater Opportunities
Just about every successful entrepreneur I've met has numerous stories of setbacks that opened the door to greater opportunities. Consider these not-so-flattering moments from the lives of famous Americans.
- Early in his career, Walt Disney's Laugh-O-Gram studio went broke, leaving the talented man out of work.
- Abraham Lincoln plummeted into financial ruin as a young shopkeeper.
- Milton Hershey failed dismally in his initial attempts to open a candy store.
- Henry Ford's Detroit Automobile Company went bankrupt before reorganizing as Ford Motor Company.
- H.J. Heinz's venture to sell horseradish flopped before his recipe for ketchup met with commercial success.
In the middle of adversity, it can be difficult to stave off feelings of hopelessness, but oftentimes a bright future waits on the other side of hardship. The mental strength acquired in dealing with misfortune can be an invaluable asset in pushing forward into new ventures.
Overcoming Adversity Wins Respect
Respect almost always is gained on difficult ground. In the words of Plutarch, "The measure of a man is the way he bears up under misfortune." No one sees your courage in the sunshine. It takes difficulty and darkness to prove bravery. When others see your character and persistence during the rough stretches in leadership, they walk away with an enhanced opinion of you.
SUMMARY
The economic crunch creates adversity, and leaders feel its pain and pressure acutely. While no one hopes for adversity, it can actually serve to benefit a leader. By bearing in mind the potential upside of leading through difficulty, it can be easier to deal with our present troubles.
Saturday, May 9, 2009
World-Class Fitness in 100 Words
This is from the CrossFit website and sounds like excellent advice. Now the challenge is to do it!! Sounds like being a kid again!
* Eat meat and vegetables, nuts and seeds, some fruit, little starch and no sugar.
* Keep intake to levels that will support exercise but not body fat.
* Practice and train major lifts: Deadlift, clean, squat, presses, C&J, and snatch.
* Similarly, master the basics of gymnastics: pull-ups, dips, rope climb, push-ups, sit-ups, presses to handstand, pirouettes, flips, splits, and holds.
* Bike, run, swim, row, etc, hard and fast. Five or six days per week mix these elements in as many combinations and patterns as creativity will allow.
* Routine is the enemy.
* Keep workouts short and intense.
* Regularly learn and play new sports.
* Eat meat and vegetables, nuts and seeds, some fruit, little starch and no sugar.
* Keep intake to levels that will support exercise but not body fat.
* Practice and train major lifts: Deadlift, clean, squat, presses, C&J, and snatch.
* Similarly, master the basics of gymnastics: pull-ups, dips, rope climb, push-ups, sit-ups, presses to handstand, pirouettes, flips, splits, and holds.
* Bike, run, swim, row, etc, hard and fast. Five or six days per week mix these elements in as many combinations and patterns as creativity will allow.
* Routine is the enemy.
* Keep workouts short and intense.
* Regularly learn and play new sports.
Friday, May 8, 2009
Lock In Your Legacy
by Chris Widener
This guy is GOOD!! Enjoy!! I am not smart enough to have thought of this, but I have done a "death file". Death file you say? Yes a death file! In this file/binder is everything that my family would need in the event of my death and it's in Dale's hands. It talks to funeral plans ( hymns, place, burial vs. cremation), insurance policies, work contract, will and testament, future family plans etc. Happy to share more if anyone has any interest. This article however is FANTASTIC! I need to get started and maybe add this to my file.
You, my friend, are going to die.
What? What kind of motivational tool is that? Real inspiring!
In fact, it is. Our mortality may perhaps be the ultimate inspiration and motivation! If we lived on this earth eternally, we could be procrastinators extraordinaire! We would never have to get anything done because there would always be tomorrow. But alas, we pass on and all we leave are the memories and the lives of others we affected while we were here. Sounds gloomy? In actuality, it is exciting! You see, this gives us purpose (and a deadline, pun intended).
We can choose how we will live on in the hearts and memories of others. We do this by purposing to live lives NOW that make change happen in ourselves, and those around us.
What kind of legacy will you leave? How will your family and friends remember you? How will you leave your descendants in the following areas? Give some thought to them and make some changes. In doing so, you will begin to lock in your legacy.
Emotionally:
Have you ever stepped back and asked yourself how you treat other people and how that effects them emotionally. I have four children, all under ten years of age. I am acutely aware that they are being shaped emotionally by how I treat them and teach them how to deal with the world. I am especially aware of this from my own background. I can directly trace my emotional shortcomings to the emotional coolness I felt from my own family. Are you raising emotionally healthy kids who are both independent as well as interdependent? Are you helping your spouse to grow emotionally? Give this some serious thought.
Spiritually:
In my mind, the “God” question is the most important. You know, I often hear people say that they are just going to let their kids “figure it out on their own.” These same people will show them how to shoot a basketball, trade stocks, and build a tree house, all simply temporal issues, but leave the answers to the biggest question up in the air! Now I am not advocating cramming anything down their throats, just taking the time to helping them find their way. Are you helping and encouraging those around you to find their spiritual life? Are you living an authentic spiritual life that will be your legacy? Give some serious thought to this.
Physically:
Now I know what you are thinking: I can’t change my genes. They got what they got and they’ll have to live with it. To a certain extent this is true. I am 5’11 for the rest of my life. I will never be 6 foot, and neither will my kids. What I am talking about though, is to be examples of taking our physical health seriously. The statistics prove that whatever bad habits you have, your kids are likely to do them as well. Why? Because you are their example. This is why I work to stay physically fit. I work out. I lift weights. I eat right (most of the time – I am a sucker for Breyer’s Vanilla Bean Ice Cream). I don’t smoke. I want to leave a legacy of health behind for my kids. True, they can still go astray, but I will do my best to give them a good example to follow. Give this some serious thought.
Financially:
There are two primary ways you can leave a financial legacy. First, teach your loved ones about how to handle money (some of you may need to learn yourself first). There are just so many good books on the subject, there is no excuse for not knowing how to handle money. Rich Dad, Poor Dad is a good book to start with, or perhaps The Millionaire Next Door. These will teach you the basics. Secondly, you can leave an inheritance. Now let me be clear on this. This does not have to be after you die. In fact, the more you have, the more I believe you ought to give away while you are alive. Let’s face it, the older you get, the less need you have for money once the basics are taken care of. It always cracks me up that by the time you can afford a big house, your kids are gone and you don’t need one! Turn the money over early so you can watch the joy of your loved ones spending, investing and giving it! This is of course predicated upon the assumption that you have first taught them how to handle it. If you have, then you should give it away while you’re alive so you can enjoy seeing your legacy in action! Give your financial inheritance some serious thought.
Relationally:
What kind of legacy will you leave in regard to how people you know interact relationally with others. When people look at how you interact with others, will they be better off if they develop the same relational habits? Will your legacy be one of love, patience, kindness, faithfulness, gentleness, and forgiveness? As you live this life, you will see that your legacy grows after you in those you influence day by day. Give the idea of influencing others relationally some serious thought.
Intellectually:
I don’t know about you, but I want to challenge people to deeper intellectual thought. In a day and age of People Magazine mentalities, we need people who will challenge us to think deeper. Are you doing anything that will challenge your sphere of influence to intellectual gains? Will those left after you are gone, say that you made them think thoughts they hadn’t before? That you challenged them to be smarter? Give this issue some serious thought.
Functionally:
Functionally? Yep. It’s a catchall word. It is how they function. It is all of the above, rolled into one. How will those you influence actually function? This is to a great degree how you function. Are you well rounded? Are you balanced? Do you keep the main things the main things? Is your life functioning well? Make it your goal to live a balanced, functional life so you can leave a legacy of such. Give your life function some serious thought.
I ended each paragraph with a challenge to think seriously about each. These aren’t issues we will solve immediately. They take a lifetime to build and they will ebb and flow. But as you diligently pursue staying on top of them all, you will be locking in that legacy you desire to leave behind!
This guy is GOOD!! Enjoy!! I am not smart enough to have thought of this, but I have done a "death file". Death file you say? Yes a death file! In this file/binder is everything that my family would need in the event of my death and it's in Dale's hands. It talks to funeral plans ( hymns, place, burial vs. cremation), insurance policies, work contract, will and testament, future family plans etc. Happy to share more if anyone has any interest. This article however is FANTASTIC! I need to get started and maybe add this to my file.
You, my friend, are going to die.
What? What kind of motivational tool is that? Real inspiring!
In fact, it is. Our mortality may perhaps be the ultimate inspiration and motivation! If we lived on this earth eternally, we could be procrastinators extraordinaire! We would never have to get anything done because there would always be tomorrow. But alas, we pass on and all we leave are the memories and the lives of others we affected while we were here. Sounds gloomy? In actuality, it is exciting! You see, this gives us purpose (and a deadline, pun intended).
We can choose how we will live on in the hearts and memories of others. We do this by purposing to live lives NOW that make change happen in ourselves, and those around us.
What kind of legacy will you leave? How will your family and friends remember you? How will you leave your descendants in the following areas? Give some thought to them and make some changes. In doing so, you will begin to lock in your legacy.
Emotionally:
Have you ever stepped back and asked yourself how you treat other people and how that effects them emotionally. I have four children, all under ten years of age. I am acutely aware that they are being shaped emotionally by how I treat them and teach them how to deal with the world. I am especially aware of this from my own background. I can directly trace my emotional shortcomings to the emotional coolness I felt from my own family. Are you raising emotionally healthy kids who are both independent as well as interdependent? Are you helping your spouse to grow emotionally? Give this some serious thought.
Spiritually:
In my mind, the “God” question is the most important. You know, I often hear people say that they are just going to let their kids “figure it out on their own.” These same people will show them how to shoot a basketball, trade stocks, and build a tree house, all simply temporal issues, but leave the answers to the biggest question up in the air! Now I am not advocating cramming anything down their throats, just taking the time to helping them find their way. Are you helping and encouraging those around you to find their spiritual life? Are you living an authentic spiritual life that will be your legacy? Give some serious thought to this.
Physically:
Now I know what you are thinking: I can’t change my genes. They got what they got and they’ll have to live with it. To a certain extent this is true. I am 5’11 for the rest of my life. I will never be 6 foot, and neither will my kids. What I am talking about though, is to be examples of taking our physical health seriously. The statistics prove that whatever bad habits you have, your kids are likely to do them as well. Why? Because you are their example. This is why I work to stay physically fit. I work out. I lift weights. I eat right (most of the time – I am a sucker for Breyer’s Vanilla Bean Ice Cream). I don’t smoke. I want to leave a legacy of health behind for my kids. True, they can still go astray, but I will do my best to give them a good example to follow. Give this some serious thought.
Financially:
There are two primary ways you can leave a financial legacy. First, teach your loved ones about how to handle money (some of you may need to learn yourself first). There are just so many good books on the subject, there is no excuse for not knowing how to handle money. Rich Dad, Poor Dad is a good book to start with, or perhaps The Millionaire Next Door. These will teach you the basics. Secondly, you can leave an inheritance. Now let me be clear on this. This does not have to be after you die. In fact, the more you have, the more I believe you ought to give away while you are alive. Let’s face it, the older you get, the less need you have for money once the basics are taken care of. It always cracks me up that by the time you can afford a big house, your kids are gone and you don’t need one! Turn the money over early so you can watch the joy of your loved ones spending, investing and giving it! This is of course predicated upon the assumption that you have first taught them how to handle it. If you have, then you should give it away while you’re alive so you can enjoy seeing your legacy in action! Give your financial inheritance some serious thought.
Relationally:
What kind of legacy will you leave in regard to how people you know interact relationally with others. When people look at how you interact with others, will they be better off if they develop the same relational habits? Will your legacy be one of love, patience, kindness, faithfulness, gentleness, and forgiveness? As you live this life, you will see that your legacy grows after you in those you influence day by day. Give the idea of influencing others relationally some serious thought.
Intellectually:
I don’t know about you, but I want to challenge people to deeper intellectual thought. In a day and age of People Magazine mentalities, we need people who will challenge us to think deeper. Are you doing anything that will challenge your sphere of influence to intellectual gains? Will those left after you are gone, say that you made them think thoughts they hadn’t before? That you challenged them to be smarter? Give this issue some serious thought.
Functionally:
Functionally? Yep. It’s a catchall word. It is how they function. It is all of the above, rolled into one. How will those you influence actually function? This is to a great degree how you function. Are you well rounded? Are you balanced? Do you keep the main things the main things? Is your life functioning well? Make it your goal to live a balanced, functional life so you can leave a legacy of such. Give your life function some serious thought.
I ended each paragraph with a challenge to think seriously about each. These aren’t issues we will solve immediately. They take a lifetime to build and they will ebb and flow. But as you diligently pursue staying on top of them all, you will be locking in that legacy you desire to leave behind!
4 Times To Get Tough!
by Scott Sawyer of Golf Quest
Great Leadership article by Scott. Worth reading especially in the times we find ourselves now. Leaders in all industries need to adapt to ever changing situations and business/political climates. Now is such a time!
When to be More Directive as a Leader
1. When the environment is uncertain.
When there is a high level of uncertainty the ability for people to make clear and confident decisions diminishes. The signs and signals they usually use to guide them are unavailable or conflicting. In these circumstances people can become paralyzed. Their failure to make a decision means action is also stalled. If people are unable to make decisions you will need to step in and help them.
2. When time is of the essence.
When there is a high sense of urgency around getting things done, a more structured leadership style is appropriate. This is the time to be more prescriptive around ‘what' and ‘how'. This can feel uncomfortable and may require some de-programming around how you typically manage. This is the time to provide crystal-clear expectations and closely monitor progress.
3. When accuracy is critical to success.
Ensuring things are done right requires you to spend more time reviewing the output of your team. Don't be afraid to get out the red pencil and provide very specific correction and feedback. Communicate the importance of attending to details and insist people double-check things before they pass them along to you.
4. When the demand to deliver intensifies.
When you are feeling increased pressure from your manager you need to translate that into a productive action plan for your team. Interestingly enough, stepping up your cheer-leading behavior rarely leads to increased activity and focus on the part of others. To send a message that something has shifted and people need to behave differently, you need to change how you communicate.
Key Principles for Effectively Directing the Work of Others
These are basic people management skills you likely learned when you took on your first leadership role. Discipline in applying them will help you provide structure and focus for others, create critical feedback loops, and enhance your team's ability to execute under pressure.
1. Provide an overarching vision. Help people see what you are trying to accomplish and how their work connects to broader goals and objectives.
2. Set clear expectations. This includes specificity around deliverables and timelines.
3. Monitor progress. Commit to regular check-in points at critical intervals.
4. Engage in root cause analysis. Obstacles should be uncovered and discussed. Reasons for delays or gaps should be thoroughly explored and understood. Ask more questions and be more wary of accepting the first answer you get.
5. Review priorities. As new and competing issues emerge you need to re-evaluate objectives and timelines and re-direct your team as appropriate.
6. Re-confirm expectations and deadlines. Follow up meetings with short notes in writing as reinforcement.
7. Measure success. It is critical to follow-through and formally review delivery against expectations. Recognize achievement. Discuss lessons learned. Good leaders have an arsenal of skills and techniques available to them, and know when and how to apply them.
There are times when giving people a lot of latitude and gentle steering are appropriate. There are times, like the ones we find ourselves in now, when you need to provide more structure and discipline. It doesn't mean you stop being supportive and encouraging. In fact, this is the time to be supportive - not just verbally and emotionally, but by providing the clarity, guidance, and accountability that will help your team succeed.
Great Leadership article by Scott. Worth reading especially in the times we find ourselves now. Leaders in all industries need to adapt to ever changing situations and business/political climates. Now is such a time!
When to be More Directive as a Leader
1. When the environment is uncertain.
When there is a high level of uncertainty the ability for people to make clear and confident decisions diminishes. The signs and signals they usually use to guide them are unavailable or conflicting. In these circumstances people can become paralyzed. Their failure to make a decision means action is also stalled. If people are unable to make decisions you will need to step in and help them.
2. When time is of the essence.
When there is a high sense of urgency around getting things done, a more structured leadership style is appropriate. This is the time to be more prescriptive around ‘what' and ‘how'. This can feel uncomfortable and may require some de-programming around how you typically manage. This is the time to provide crystal-clear expectations and closely monitor progress.
3. When accuracy is critical to success.
Ensuring things are done right requires you to spend more time reviewing the output of your team. Don't be afraid to get out the red pencil and provide very specific correction and feedback. Communicate the importance of attending to details and insist people double-check things before they pass them along to you.
4. When the demand to deliver intensifies.
When you are feeling increased pressure from your manager you need to translate that into a productive action plan for your team. Interestingly enough, stepping up your cheer-leading behavior rarely leads to increased activity and focus on the part of others. To send a message that something has shifted and people need to behave differently, you need to change how you communicate.
Key Principles for Effectively Directing the Work of Others
These are basic people management skills you likely learned when you took on your first leadership role. Discipline in applying them will help you provide structure and focus for others, create critical feedback loops, and enhance your team's ability to execute under pressure.
1. Provide an overarching vision. Help people see what you are trying to accomplish and how their work connects to broader goals and objectives.
2. Set clear expectations. This includes specificity around deliverables and timelines.
3. Monitor progress. Commit to regular check-in points at critical intervals.
4. Engage in root cause analysis. Obstacles should be uncovered and discussed. Reasons for delays or gaps should be thoroughly explored and understood. Ask more questions and be more wary of accepting the first answer you get.
5. Review priorities. As new and competing issues emerge you need to re-evaluate objectives and timelines and re-direct your team as appropriate.
6. Re-confirm expectations and deadlines. Follow up meetings with short notes in writing as reinforcement.
7. Measure success. It is critical to follow-through and formally review delivery against expectations. Recognize achievement. Discuss lessons learned. Good leaders have an arsenal of skills and techniques available to them, and know when and how to apply them.
There are times when giving people a lot of latitude and gentle steering are appropriate. There are times, like the ones we find ourselves in now, when you need to provide more structure and discipline. It doesn't mean you stop being supportive and encouraging. In fact, this is the time to be supportive - not just verbally and emotionally, but by providing the clarity, guidance, and accountability that will help your team succeed.
Sentenced To Success
by Chris Widener
Another great article by one of my favorite authors and people! Enjoy!
I once heard a speaker use the statement, “I have been sentenced to success!” I heard that almost twenty years ago, yet it still sticks in my head.
Imagine that. What if we had been given a life sentence to serve, say 75 years, and the sentence was to do time in a place called “Success”? The truth is that we have.
Let me back up. We have been given a life sentence. But, unlike a sentencing in a real life courtroom, we get to actually choose where we will “do our time.”
Here are some of the choices people make:
The prison of poverty:
Poor people are no better or kinder or anything else than people with money. People are people regardless of how much money they have. Frankly, I have had little and I have had a lot, and yes, I will choose having a lot! When you choose to live in poverty you are in a prison that does not allow you the freedoms we were intended to experience. We are unable to help others as we desire. My advice? Don’t choose a sentence to the prison of poverty.
The prison of depression:
Depression is like a blanket that overwhelms you and eventually smothers you. Now before you go accusing me with, “Chris. You just don’t understand.” Yes I do. I have had a history of depression. Depression is rampant in my family of origin. I know firsthand what a prison depression is. When you are locked up in depression you cannot live life as it was intended. But you can get out! My advice? Don’t choose a sentence to the prison of depression.
The prison of the lack of health:
Lacking health is a real pain! The freedom we lose when we choose to live in a state of a lack of health is terrible – and unnecessary! We don’t have to live in that prison. We can choose a different sentence! We can choose health! My advice? Don’t choose a sentence to the prison of the lack of health.
The prison of doubt, worry, and fear:
This is a dark, dark prison. It is one that haunts you the whole time you reside there. It makes you believe that the surroundings are worse than the really are. It keeps you from enjoying life and becoming the kind of person you were intended to become! My advice? Don’t choose a sentence to the prison of poverty. My advice? Don’t choose a sentence to the prison of doubt, worry and fear.
There is another option. You can choose to be sentenced to success! You can choose to actually be set free! You can choose to walk out of that courtroom and live the life that you choose!
What can you experience when you are sentenced to success How about these:
* Good health
* Financial abundance
* Emotional freedom
* Positive relationships
* A career you love
* Spiritual liberty
And how will you experience these? By choice. Your choice. You choose exactly what kind of life you will live. You choose the sentence you will serve here on earth and the experience that you have.
Will you languish in a dark prison or in the open freedom that comes from the sentence of success? That depends on the choices you make.
I challenge you to choose this day to:
* Pursue financial independence
* Develop yourself spiritually
* Make a change so you are in a career you love
* Re-commit yourself to loving relationships
* Achieve emotional health
Make a choice TODAY. Do not spend another day in a prison where you do not belong!
Where will you serve your sentence? You get to decide.
As for me?
I have been sentenced to success!
Another great article by one of my favorite authors and people! Enjoy!
I once heard a speaker use the statement, “I have been sentenced to success!” I heard that almost twenty years ago, yet it still sticks in my head.
Imagine that. What if we had been given a life sentence to serve, say 75 years, and the sentence was to do time in a place called “Success”? The truth is that we have.
Let me back up. We have been given a life sentence. But, unlike a sentencing in a real life courtroom, we get to actually choose where we will “do our time.”
Here are some of the choices people make:
The prison of poverty:
Poor people are no better or kinder or anything else than people with money. People are people regardless of how much money they have. Frankly, I have had little and I have had a lot, and yes, I will choose having a lot! When you choose to live in poverty you are in a prison that does not allow you the freedoms we were intended to experience. We are unable to help others as we desire. My advice? Don’t choose a sentence to the prison of poverty.
The prison of depression:
Depression is like a blanket that overwhelms you and eventually smothers you. Now before you go accusing me with, “Chris. You just don’t understand.” Yes I do. I have had a history of depression. Depression is rampant in my family of origin. I know firsthand what a prison depression is. When you are locked up in depression you cannot live life as it was intended. But you can get out! My advice? Don’t choose a sentence to the prison of depression.
The prison of the lack of health:
Lacking health is a real pain! The freedom we lose when we choose to live in a state of a lack of health is terrible – and unnecessary! We don’t have to live in that prison. We can choose a different sentence! We can choose health! My advice? Don’t choose a sentence to the prison of the lack of health.
The prison of doubt, worry, and fear:
This is a dark, dark prison. It is one that haunts you the whole time you reside there. It makes you believe that the surroundings are worse than the really are. It keeps you from enjoying life and becoming the kind of person you were intended to become! My advice? Don’t choose a sentence to the prison of poverty. My advice? Don’t choose a sentence to the prison of doubt, worry and fear.
There is another option. You can choose to be sentenced to success! You can choose to actually be set free! You can choose to walk out of that courtroom and live the life that you choose!
What can you experience when you are sentenced to success How about these:
* Good health
* Financial abundance
* Emotional freedom
* Positive relationships
* A career you love
* Spiritual liberty
And how will you experience these? By choice. Your choice. You choose exactly what kind of life you will live. You choose the sentence you will serve here on earth and the experience that you have.
Will you languish in a dark prison or in the open freedom that comes from the sentence of success? That depends on the choices you make.
I challenge you to choose this day to:
* Pursue financial independence
* Develop yourself spiritually
* Make a change so you are in a career you love
* Re-commit yourself to loving relationships
* Achieve emotional health
Make a choice TODAY. Do not spend another day in a prison where you do not belong!
Where will you serve your sentence? You get to decide.
As for me?
I have been sentenced to success!
Monday, May 4, 2009
The Power of Praising People
by Chris Widener
One of the keys to success is to have successful relationships. We are not islands and we don’t get to the top by ourselves. And one of the key ways to grow successful in our relationships is to be “life-giving” people to others. Every person we meet, we either give life to or take life from. You know what I mean. There are people who encourage you and when you are done being with them you feel built up. Then there are others who you feel torn down by. Successful people are people who have mastered the art of building others up.
One of the ways we build people up is to praise them. There is power in praising people! Something begins to happen in them, in you, and in your relationship when you praise someone. Remember a time when someone told you something about yourself in a praising manner? It was great, wasn’t it? You probably liked that person more after they praised you, didn’t you?
Now I am not talking about praising people for the sake of praising people. I am talking about honestly looking for and praising positive character traits and action of others around you. Don’t lie to people. If they have done something wrong, correct it, but when they do something right, Praise it!
With that said, here are benefits of and ways to start praising people.
Benefits
Your relationship grows. Life is about relationships. Family relationships, friends, and co-workers. When we begin to praise people for their positive aspects, our relationships grow. It puts them, and us, on the fast track. Your leadership and influence grows. Who is going to have greater leadership and influence capacity in the lives of their followers, the one who tears down or the one who builds up?
Stronger relationships and loyalty. When the person is appreciated and praised, they become fiercely loyal, because they know that you care for them, love them, and appreciate them. This will take you to success.
Happier, more fulfilled people. I truly believe it is our job to build others up and that they need it. It is a good thing, in and of itself to invest in the lives of others by praising and encouraging them. Even if we never get anything in return, it is the right thing to do to build up other people. Someone else will always come along to tear them down; the successful person will instill in them the power of praise!
Some ways to praise
Character traits. Is there someone you know who is joyful? Hard-working? Honest? Then let them know how much you appreciate that in them. You can do it with a word or a card, or a phone call. Say something like this, “You know Tom, I think it is great that you are such a hard-worker. It seems like you are always the first one here and the last one to leave. You really set a good example and I want you to know how much I appreciate that.” Simple!
Action. Same idea as above. “Sue, I don’t know if anybody else has told you this, but your work on the Johnson account was excellent. You have a wonderful ability to communicate the vision of the project and that helps all of the rest of us out in our roles and tasks. Thanks for that. It is greatly appreciated.”
Other ways you can show praise and appreciation is with a card, a gift, or time off from work.
Make it your goal to praise at least five people a day. If you can, praise ten people a day. Or perhaps you can try to praise everyone you come in contact with. It will take work but it is possible. It just takes discipline and a little work.
Any way you cut it though, there is power in praising people. First for them, then for you!
One of the keys to success is to have successful relationships. We are not islands and we don’t get to the top by ourselves. And one of the key ways to grow successful in our relationships is to be “life-giving” people to others. Every person we meet, we either give life to or take life from. You know what I mean. There are people who encourage you and when you are done being with them you feel built up. Then there are others who you feel torn down by. Successful people are people who have mastered the art of building others up.
One of the ways we build people up is to praise them. There is power in praising people! Something begins to happen in them, in you, and in your relationship when you praise someone. Remember a time when someone told you something about yourself in a praising manner? It was great, wasn’t it? You probably liked that person more after they praised you, didn’t you?
Now I am not talking about praising people for the sake of praising people. I am talking about honestly looking for and praising positive character traits and action of others around you. Don’t lie to people. If they have done something wrong, correct it, but when they do something right, Praise it!
With that said, here are benefits of and ways to start praising people.
Benefits
Your relationship grows. Life is about relationships. Family relationships, friends, and co-workers. When we begin to praise people for their positive aspects, our relationships grow. It puts them, and us, on the fast track. Your leadership and influence grows. Who is going to have greater leadership and influence capacity in the lives of their followers, the one who tears down or the one who builds up?
Stronger relationships and loyalty. When the person is appreciated and praised, they become fiercely loyal, because they know that you care for them, love them, and appreciate them. This will take you to success.
Happier, more fulfilled people. I truly believe it is our job to build others up and that they need it. It is a good thing, in and of itself to invest in the lives of others by praising and encouraging them. Even if we never get anything in return, it is the right thing to do to build up other people. Someone else will always come along to tear them down; the successful person will instill in them the power of praise!
Some ways to praise
Character traits. Is there someone you know who is joyful? Hard-working? Honest? Then let them know how much you appreciate that in them. You can do it with a word or a card, or a phone call. Say something like this, “You know Tom, I think it is great that you are such a hard-worker. It seems like you are always the first one here and the last one to leave. You really set a good example and I want you to know how much I appreciate that.” Simple!
Action. Same idea as above. “Sue, I don’t know if anybody else has told you this, but your work on the Johnson account was excellent. You have a wonderful ability to communicate the vision of the project and that helps all of the rest of us out in our roles and tasks. Thanks for that. It is greatly appreciated.”
Other ways you can show praise and appreciation is with a card, a gift, or time off from work.
Make it your goal to praise at least five people a day. If you can, praise ten people a day. Or perhaps you can try to praise everyone you come in contact with. It will take work but it is possible. It just takes discipline and a little work.
Any way you cut it though, there is power in praising people. First for them, then for you!
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